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A Stroke – of luck?

Back in August I experienced motor control loss in my left arm and both legs which lasted for about 5 or 6 days. We, and the PA at the Dr’s office had no idea what could have caused this and I was advised by the PA to see my primary physician when he made his weekly visit up the hill (San Bernardino mountains). So after waiting 5 days we saw the Doctor and he told me he wanted me to have an MRI to rule out a stroke. After a week I still hadn’t heard from the Dr’s office or the place I was being referred to. Finally after 2 weeks they called to setup the appt, and in a week I saw them and had my MRI. Another 2 weeks went by before I finally saw my Doctor to get the results which indicated that I had experienced a stroke.

Until then, my husband and I had thought I had experienced either a nerve problem (I have a herniated disk at my neck) or it was a reaction to new meds I had begun taken just a couple of days before the stroke.

We were wrong.

The results (which had begun with the left arm and both legs, turned into just the left arm and left leg, had only had limited motor control for about 5 or 6 days, then I was fine. I could move all my limbs normally, nothing had been permanently altered, at least with my limbs.

The Doctor said that the area which experienced the stroke controlled (1) the motor control of my legs and arms, and (2) personality. After hearing that, I realized that shortly after it happened I began to really doubt and second guess what I was doing with my life and with school, and then even more questions surfaced once we had confirmation that it was a stroke. I wondered if I would be around long enough in this world to even finish school – which led to questions about what in my life had I really accomplished and do I have time to devote 100% into fulfilling all of the goals I’ve wanted to pursue in my life.

A friend recently told me that I should make a decision and stick with it. Up until this moment I’ve always hesitated about making decisions, fearing that I couldn’t live up to those decisions, or I was making the wrong decisions for myself, or would my decisions effect someone else’s life negatively – I could go on!

My husband has always tried to encourage me to make decisions, more firm decisions. I love my husband but I think hearing the words from someone else made the meaning hit home really hard.

There are things I want to do during this lifetime. I want to pursue those dreams/goals with every ounce of my being for as long as I have left in this world.

Oh – and I had a 2nd MRI with Contrast done recently and got the results – no more strokes since the last one!

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